[Intro]
(1..2..1.2.3.4!!!)
 
 
[Verse 1]
 
Tom:
D
  I don't want to 
A            G
urinate on myself 
D
  I don't want to 
A      G          A
urinate on anyone else 
D                    A
  Well, I guess that really 
        G
doesn't matter anymore 
D                    A
  Because I can't control
   G          A
my bladder anymore 
 
 
[Chorus 1]
 
Tom:
D G A
      Well I guess
         D    G
it all depends 
 
Mark:
undergarments
 
Tom:
D G A
     Well I guess 
         D    G
it all depends 
 
Mark:
undergarments
 
Tom:
A
  Step back in the 
D    A        G
light No more soiled 
            A
nights alone But 
        D
I guess I don't 
        G
have a care 
                   A
Because there's not a
load in my underwear
 
 
Verse 2:
 
Mark:
D               A
  I'm sick of offending everyone
  G
I meet (go go go go)
D             A
  I'm sick of crying myself to
 G              A
sleep on rubber sheets (go)
D          A          G
  I had an accident today
D          A
  I left a soiled bus seat
G               A
  I didn't know what to say
 
 
Chorus 2
 
Mark:
D G A
      But I guess
         D    G
it all depends 
 
Tom:
undergarments
 
Mark:
D G A
      Well I guess
         D    G
it all depends  
 
Tom:
undergarments
 
Mark:
A
  Step back in the 
D    A        G
light No more soiled 
            A
nights alone Well
I guess I didn't
D
I have to care 
   G
if I don't have a
A               D(hold)
load in my underwear 
 
 
Tom:
Uh anyway uh well
as I was saying
my dog nice dog
bending over uh
If you dropped your keys
you'd bend over too
 
Scott:
Uh so uh well
uh just wanna say
thank you all for
coming to the sperm
bank Do you have a
question there?
 
Mark:
Shit Scott That aki-mofo
be messing with
my lady gotta be
running cold upsidedown
his head you know
what I'm sayin mans? Hey
holmes I can dig it
that brotha ain't
gonna pick up on you
man i say hey Scott,
So to say i want to say
pretty J I did the
same-ol same-ol
hey knock yourself
on a post lick
the gray metal fat man
before he was down
I take tcb'in man
Hey you know what they
say you see about to
get that bottie yacker
you lay her down
and slackum yackum
cold gotta be ya
know man SHIT
 
Tom:
Uh are you uh
feelin' all right?
 
Mark:
Oh man jamofoba lay me
to the bone and
she's jackin me
up tightly!
Alright Get out the
scissors and get in place
Ready? Now start choppin
 
Tom:
Hey man someone spotted
me it's heavy!
 
Mark:
Alright now heave
it on down here!
(sound of someone or something
falling down the stairs)
 
Tom:
Okay it's all the
way down there!
 
Mark:
Aw who taught you how to
throw the dick down the stairs?